Time 2200 hrs
Location: Kenyatta National Hospital
The air is full of the wailing sirens of the incoming ambulances, the emergency doctors are standing by the doors,stethoscopes in hand struggling to keep their eyes open in the blinding lights. Their bodies are full of adrenaline; it is gushing through their veins, pouring out of their pores all in readiness to fulfill their childhood dream of saving lives. Yet it is all in vain! All in vain, for the victims are all dead. All three thousand of them erased from the face of the earth.
Name of deceased: Kenyan Woman
Time of death : 9:59
Cause of death: strangulation
Object of strangulation: brassiere commonly known us push up.
Okay, so maybe this is a tad exaggerated but you have to agree with me that this push up business is getting out of hand. I’m walking along the streets of Nairobi and I can no longer tell where chins end and breasts start.(I’m serious. Dear ladies please start making markings like ‘end of chin, start of boobies’ lest a male finds himself in a sexual harassment case while he was just trying to be romantic- men I hope you noted; touching a girls chin is romantic) I’m all for sexual empowerment of women and that is why I won’t wear a bra. Breasts are what make us women; the symbols of our femininity and no I shall not enclose my femininity in a tight piece of cloth or metal ( yes, some of this bras are made of metal! Why don’t we just make it easier and put handcuffs around our chests its the same thing anyway!) Where on earth have you seen men putting their bulging balls in boxes in the name of decency? When a man walks around his trophy threatening to tear his fly no one bats an eyelid but when a woman goes out one nipple showing, the world is said to be supposedly ending? What irks me the most is that women are the first to ostracize liberated ( literally) women who don’t wear bras. I never wore a bra in highschool and I’m not about to start wearing one. Dear woman can’t you see?? Bras are just the outward symbol of the slavery we put ourselves in. How do you expect us to compete with men when we are short of breath because some foreign thing is bearing down our chests like a dog collar? We won’t let our breasts show because some old woman circumsciser said a girl shouldn’t go showing her nipples, or we will wear ‘breathtaking’ bras because some boy likes it when they are up there…well that boy is sure in for a surprise when he unclasps that bra and down they fall like a sack of potatoes. Rihanna doesn’t wear bras and no one tells her anything…yes , yes, I know you aren’t Rihanna but who said you can’t be? Someone else told me that ‘hizo ni boobs za wazungu’ She was wearing a push up so I gave her CPR; her brain was having a deficiency of oxygen ( told you this things are dangerous).
So I could talk all day long and still be branded as crazy but its actually a scientific thing Bras are bad for your health!! This is from https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.lifehack.org/336735/science-proves-that-wearing-bras-bad-for-your-health&ved=2ahUKEwi9toHB0fzeAhXIe8AKHR4BBK8QFjARegQIARAB&usg=AOvVaw0OYxxp6THX5DqCgJi1LFeH
Professor Jean-Denis Rouillan, of the Centre Hospitalier Universitaire de Besancon in France, revealed that bras are not necessary for women’s breast health. According to his study, a bra is not necessary anatomically, medically, or physiologically. Instead, bras actually prevent breasts from growing or achieving their natural lift.
Research Background and Results
In the study, 330 volunteers aged 18 to 35 had their breasts measured over 15 years. The results showed that women who did not wear a bra had a 7-millimeter lift in their nipples each year. In addition to this, the breasts of the women who did not wear bras also showed fewer stretch marks. Their breasts were even firmer than those of women who regularly wore bras.
So all those who’ve been asking me why my boobs are so firm and and round there’s your answer our bodies are made in such a miraculous way that they can support themselves. If you still think you need to wear a bra then dont forget to buy some for your ears and nose and fingers and all other body projections.
So I’ve written this in the evening when all you ‘high and mighty’ bra -wearing women are home and have unclasped your clothes of bondage – I imagine you feel the same way mummies feel when their bandages are removed ;relieved but insecure – so that when you start chasing me I’ll not run too fast but you won’t catch me because your flapping breasts will hit hard against your weak chest and slow you down.
Its time we broke free from this bras,oops sorry I meant chains, of gender slavery. And what better way to start than getting rid of the physical ones. #braless